Madam Cranky Pants

Being tired all the time is, well, exhausting.  Seems redundant doesn't it?  I have a doctor's appointment on Thursday and we will be talking about what I have been doing and what the next steps are in figuring out what's going on.  I'm praying that we can have some real answers.  I have had so many doctor visits, blood draws and various tests of one kind or another since last April!  I know we have made a lot of progress in figuring out what is NOT wrong with me and this is helping narrow it down to what IS wrong but it is a very frustrating process.

For awhile it was a bit better but since the end of January the tired factor has gotten worse and worse again.  I'm about where I was before the holidays.  It makes it really hard to make it through the work day, let alone get my workouts in.

I spend a lot of time pushing through the things that I have to do or want to do badly enough.  I spent Friday and Saturday at my daughter's State Swim meet.  Lot's of driving and energy expended in all the excitement.  Sunday and Monday were literally curled up on the couch not wanting to do anything.  I did go do my run on Monday and even that was ugly.  I ran not quite three miles and then had to walk the rest because I just didn't have the energy to push it to the end.  I missed a favorite family function on Sunday because I was just too tired.  Not the "I'm depressed and don't want to get out of my PJs" kind of tired, just in case you are going there.  More like "I'm coming down with the flu and have no energy" kind of tired but I never actually get the flu.

When I'm tired like this I get crabby and weepy.  To be perfectly honest it looks a lot like PMS on steroids when I'm like this.  Only it lasts longer than a week.  My poor husband has been dealing with the brunt of me being Madam Cranky Pants.  I wouldn't be surprised if he was more than happy to go to work this morning just to get a break from me.  I want a break from me!  lol

I ran 4 miles on Monday and swam for 30 minutes today.  I am keeping my promise to myself to continue even though I'm struggling.

If you are reading this and you are a Believer then I would appreciate prayers.  Both for a better attitude on my end and for guidance for my doctor.  Or healing.  :-)  Healing would be good.

Thanks for letting me vent.  Not the most uplifting or positive post ever but it's where I am at and it's real.  I figured since I have about 3 followers then it would be okay.  :-)