Focusing on What I'm Grateful for.

As I adjust to my new normal I have been thinking about a lot of things.  This past year was a bit crazy with a lot of changes and new adventures.  I felt like I was stretched to my limits many many times and how I dealt with it wasn't always pretty.  Things have calmed down a bit now so I am learning, or re-learning, that it is okay to sometimes put myself first.  

The things that have settled are:

• Old house is sold.
• Youngest kiddo graduated high school.
• Successful graduation party for kiddo and her two besties (in spite of no kitchen due an unexpected remodel 😖)
• Moved into the new house.
• New house is 90% unpacked.  (The beginning of a new school year slowed down that process.)
• Youngest kiddo officially dropped off at college and successfully launched into phase one of adulting.  
• Joe's Santa Rosa race is done with his personal goal being crushed.  (I'm a wee bit proud!)
• Hubby taking a little break from Ironman training so that I can have a break from Ironman #1 support person.  (It's a lot harder than I ever think it will be.)
• Packed up classroom.
• Unpacked classroom in a new room.  

I'm feeling more settled and on a more even keel.  My workouts aren't dialed in but I'm getting better every week.  Better as in, I am remembering more and more that I CAN do these things.  I am remembering more and more how much it helps me stay on that even keel.  I have been working on dialing in my eating, since I know that I use that as a comfort and not in a healthy way.  Since the beginning of the school year I have lost 13 pounds.

All of these things sound great but I'm still struggling with some things.  A long time ago when I started my journey toward being a healthier me I had a long term goal.  In my effort to deal with the slow progress I made and the many setbacks and start-overs I had a long term goal.  The goal was that by the time I was 50 I would be at the healthy weight I wanted and be so much faster at the running.  That goal eventually included the swimming and biking parts too.  

I turn 50 next month.  

I'm nowhere near where I wanted to be.  

Not even close.  

It's hard not to focus on that.  I know that if I do focus on that too much then I will wallow in it and get sad about it and the downward spiral starts spinning.  

Since my school year began I have been working really hard on keeping my mindset positive.  Not always easy but it's getting better.  

One of the ways I have worked at keeping the more positive mindset is to keep an attitude of gratefulness.  Because I have SO MANY things to be grateful for.  

I am grateful for friends who send me flowers and a beautiful card the day after a race weekend that made me feel incredibly special and loved.

Thank you Kelli!!  💜

I am grateful for friends that drag me out of my house to do 5k races at the last minute.  Then hang out and eat lunch with me at my house.  

3rd place age group (Me) and 2nd Place age group (Kathryn)  Yay us!

Finn ran with me and he got a medal too! 

I am grateful for friends that invite us to be involved in their epic days.  Got to crew for some friends during their Mountain Lakes 100 mile trail run.  One friend got a fabulous PR and another friend finished her first ever 100 miler.  So amazing to be a small part of their day.  

The view as we were driving to the race start. 

Me and my best guy before the race began.  

Pote looking solid as she fuels up after about 26 miles. 

Josh with his pacer Joe getting ready to head out around Timothy Lake.

Kristy being all chill after finishing her first 100 😀

Congrats to Kristy!

Kristy with her #1 Support Person, Tony.

I failed to get any pictures of Josh finishing.  He got done WAY faster than we anticipated and caught me off guard.  lol  He definitely didn't hate that at all.  😜

I am grateful for being able to take advantage of the last few days of sunshine and explore new roads where I am now living.  I'm also grateful that I am comfortable going out and being active alone.  Sometimes that alone time to just do my own thing is good.

Beautiful fall day.

Still smiling even though I got stung in the jaw by a bee.  🐝

I am grateful for times walking about in the woods having great conversations, lots of laughter and maybe a few tears with people who love me even when I'm not at my best and am struggling with the dark places.  I have had people who did not do that in the past so that makes me appreciate the ones that have stuck it out with me!  I'm also grateful for goofy dogs that make me smile.

Greta, Georgia, Finn and Niko

Love the fall colors!

 I am grateful for a husband that takes the time to be with me and goes on adventures with me.

Champoeg State Park, Willamette River.

Even the feather I found had some fall colors.

I am grateful for my Pure Endurance coach and teammates.  I am grateful that I was willing to face the unknown and work towards what seemed like a ridiculous goal of doing an Olympic triathlon.  Setting that goal has brought the most amazing people into my life.  I am grateful that they cheered me on all season long even when I wasn't putting in the work to do more than just participate.

Not everyone is in this picture but I love my team and all their support!!

I am grateful for a boss that understood my need for a classroom with windows to the outside.  It has already been an incredible blessing to open the shades and get daylight into my room.  Or open the door and feel the fresh air, hear the wind blow, hear the rain fall and just know moment to moment what is going on with the weather and daylight.  I'm enjoying putting on my coat and standing outside my door to greet my students.  I know I will be enjoying it all year long.  I have a funny feeling that if it snows this winter, I will be the one with my class outside trying to catch snowflakes in our mouths.  😉


I am grateful for the amazing men and women I work with.  The ones that show up every day to an extraordinarily difficult job and put kids first.  It amazing to be a part of the staff at South Albany High School.  Some days it is a grind working through all the extra things we deal without outside of teaching the content.  But there are so many bright moments when students shine and getting to watch it happen brings tears to my eyes.

So....
I may not be the weight I want to be.
Or the athlete I thought I would be.
I am dealing with a terrible case of adult acne/rosacea.
I am feeling terrible self-conscious about my appearance.
I feel fat and frumpy.  I know it's getting better but it's hard not to linger here. 

But....
When I start to focus on those things,
I'm going to work at changing the story in my head.
I'm going to remember I have SO MUCH to be grateful for!

Best in the West 2019

School has started and I'm working on getting back into the regular swing of things.  But before we officially end summer one more thing has to happen.  The last big triathlon event for our 2019 season.

The Best in the West 2019.

The name does not lie, it really is the Best in the West!

The Best in the West is three days of events at Foster Lake in Sweet Home, Oregon.  There is everything literally an event for everyone, no matter what your comfort level is something for you to try.  I love that!  I also love how all weekend long it is one big celebration of the fact that people are out there being active!

Because my husband is a little bit crazy he signed up for four events!  He did a 25 mile bike ride on Friday.  I would have done that as well but it was my first week back to school so I didn't think taking a day off would be a good idea.  Joe dropped me off at work in the morning and drove up with the travel trailer and got it parked.  Then he went on his bike ride, came back and got the trailer all set up.  He came back to town to pick me up from work so we could head back to Foster Lake and settle in for the weekend.

Saturday morning we were up bright and early.  Joe was going to help with parking starting at 5:00 a.m. before he started his Olympic triathlon (Event #2).  I was volunteering at the body marking for the races that morning.  My shift started at 6:00 a.m.

I love doing the body marking.  People are kind of all over the place.  Some are really excited and some are really nervous.  A lot of people are both.  Some are focused and don't say much, others chatter away the whole time.  I got to help people figure out where to put stickers on their bike and helmet, how they should rack their bike and lots of other things.  I loved being able to joke with people, help them out and start their race day with a smile.  Seriously makes me just grin from ear to ear all morning long.

I was able to get done in time to watch Joe come out of the water and head up to the bike transition.  We had a lot of teammates racing that day too.  Rebecca and her husband were doing the aquathon, which is a swim and bike.  Cathy, Kellie, Ryan, Kristin and Katy were also doing the Olympic triathlon.  Kristin was the overall female winner, Rebecca got second overall for women in the Olympic Aquathon and Ryan also got second in his age group.  Kari came out for the day and hung out with me cheering for all of our teammates.  It's pretty fun to be part of such a great group of people.

Ryan, Coach Kristin, Rebecca, Katy, Kellie, Joe, me, Kari, Cathy and Coach Jon.

It was a long day but so much fun!  Joe and I headed back to the trailer for a quick nap.  It wasn't long before Joe's Aunt Nancy was there.  Well, she is my Aunt Nancy too at this point.  lol  Nancy did a seven mile walk event in San Francisco last spring with a bunch of girlfriends.  She had a blast, got her t-shirt and her medal and was hooked.  She looked at the events on the Best in the West website when I posted on Facebook that we had registered and signed up for the 5k.  So when she came to get her packet we had her come over to the trailer and have dinner with us.  We had a great evening talking and visiting.

Soon Nancy left to go spend the evening in her hotel, I think she was looking forward to an evening by herself.  Joe and I finished getting things ready for the race the next day we headed for bed as well.  It wasn't long after we went to bed that the rain really started coming down.  And it didn't stop all night long.

We got up Sunday morning to take part in the Sprint Triathlon (Event #3 for Joe, Event #1 for me).  Now it was my turn to get my body marked.  I was starting to get really nervous and wondering if I should just bail on doing the event at all.  My consistency with working out hadn't really improved much since Tri at the Grove.  I was totally going into this race with idea of just having fun but I was really battling the disappointment in myself for not doing what I needed to do in order to do my best at the event.

Then my teammate Kelli spots me.  Big hugs and excited chatter.  I seriously adore this woman!  She was talking about how great I was going to do and I confessed how I was feeling about the day.  She immediately stopped everything and prayed with me.  Such.  A.  Blessing!!!  Just what I needed to adjust my attitude.

Time to put on the wetsuit and start getting ready to get this race done. 

Kari, Kelli, Logan and me warming up before the race.  We listen to our coach!  ;-)

Kelli, Kari and I, pre-race smiles

Joe had pushed the bike ride on the Olympic triathlon the day before and had decided to take the Sprint a little easier.  I mentioned that it would be fun to do the race together and he was all over that idea.  This made my heart smile, big time.  I seriously love my husband for so so many reasons!

Unfortunately he was in one of the first waves to head out on the swim and I was in the very last wave to start.  He had a very long wait in transition for me.  A very very long wait.

But not because I was slow.  Just because I started so long after him.

I had a really great swim.  I mean really great for me!  I did the swim in 14:10!  That's an average pace of 2:12 per 100 yards.  I am pretty sure that is the fastest pace I have ever done in a race.  I felt relaxed and smooth the entire swim.  Was a little disoriented because I was with lots of people the entire swim and usually end up off by myself by the halfway point.  Not this time.  ;-)

Finishing the swim with a bunch of other people!

The rain was getting harder at this point so we were going to have a soggy bike ride.  But it still doesn't compare to the Oregon Dunes triathlon of 2017!!  If you were there, you know what I'm talking about.  It wasn't freezing, or hailing, or dumping cats and dogs.  It was just a warm fall rain.  Very doable.

I headed up to transition to get ready for the bike ride.  Joe was all ready to go and waiting for me.  We left transition together.  I found out later he had waited 25 minutes for me to finish.  A friend told me that he was finishing the swim before I ever got into the water.

We took off on the bike ride.  Even though we were together we couldn't ride side by side because of USAT rules so Joe rode behind me and let me take the lead.  We were still able to talk and joke while we were riding.   I had a lot of fun on the bike in spite of the rain, or maybe because of it.  I was working hard but not feeling like I was struggling.  I know I can do that route faster but all things considering I was able to put in a solid ride for me.

Playing bikes in the rain with my favorite guy chasing me.  😁

The only scary moment was right after we did the turn around and were heading back.  When you go around the turnaround it is a bit of a straight stretch and then you go around a corner that veers off to the left.  We were nearing the corner and we see a car come screeching around the corner.  That was a bit scary but it got down right terrifying when the car started sliding on the wet rode and losing control....while it was coming right at us!  I'm hitting the brakes on my bike and trying to decide which way would be the best direction to try and avoid the car when it regained control and went speeding past.  That got the heart rate going.  Scary!!

We got back to the transition and got ready to start the run.  I had a decent transition and headed out with Joe.  My goal was to do the run faster than I did the run at Tri at the Grove.  That was a flat course so in order to do this run faster on a hilly course I was definitely going to have to run more.  I figured I would fast walk up the hills and trot down them.  It worked pretty well.  I felt good overall but the last half mile or so I was having some pain across the tops of my toes.  I had been having that most of the summer but was hoping it wouldn't happen anymore because I had new shoes.  It took longer for the uncomfortable feeling to start so that was a plus.

As we were heading back to the finish line we passed our fabulous friend Erin.  Erin is part of the Posse that keeps all things Best in the West running and organized.  A very important part!  Erin is the smiling face that keeps the packet pick up and registration areas running and organized.  Over the years we have gotten to know her as Joe was racing.  When I started racing too Erin was so encouraging and supportive.  She was also great at flicking both Joe and I crap and I loved it!  It always makes me smile and always makes me feel like I really am a part of this crazy triathlon community.  Now it was her turn.  She was doing the Super Sprint.  Her first triathlon....and her last.  She says she is going out on top.  She loved being able to go through the experience but doesn't see any reason to do it again. lol

When we saw Erin we both started shouting and had to run up and give her big hugs!!  So proud of her and all the things she had to make work right to do this race.  I loved being able to see her during the race and give her back some of the encouragement she has always shown me.

Soon we were heading past my favorite aid station.  It's my favorite because it is really really close to the finish line.  lol  We got on the trail and headed down to the lake.  Our teammate Rebecca has a friend named Gerritt who was competing in the Sprint and uses a wheelchair.  A special arm crank one for the bike and a different one for the run.  We had passed him during the bike ride but he had caught up with us and passed us during the run.

As we were heading down the trail we see a woman holding onto the back of his chair.  Gerritt told us that he didn't have any brakes on this chair and the hill was pretty steep with a sharp turn at the bottom.  Joe run up and took the chair from the woman and helped him get down the hill.  I had run ahead but once the guys were at the bottom of the hill it didn't take long for Gerritt to go whipping by me.  He had a big ole smile on his face so I'm okay with him kicking my butt.  lol

As we approached the bridge that's when you start hearing the people shouting and you know the finish line is so close!  We were greeted by our teammates cheering for us and as we turned the corner to go across the finish Joe and I held hands.

I loved finished together.  I loved playing triathlon together.  Maybe if we do that again I can be a little faster...going to have to work on that.

Finished...together! ❤

But there was no time to enjoy being done because we had signed up for the Mixed Team Relay and we needed to get things set up, get body marking and get our timing chips.  It was a little frenzied trying to get it all set up and be back by the lake for the race briefing.

There was a bit of a pause in the race briefing as Erin came in to finish her Super Sprint Triathlon.  We all had to cheer (very loudly) and a bunch of the Posse members ran with her to the finish line.  Way to go Erin!!!

Erin probably doesn't like this picture because her eyes are closed but I absolutely LOVE her smile!!

Mixed Team Relay has two men and two women.  Our team was myself, Joe, our teammates Kathryn and Logan.  Our name was Pure-ly for Fun!  Which is good because I was the first leg and that meant we were starting off behind everyone.  lol

The water was a 250 meter swim and you couldn't wear a wetsuit.  The rain had let us some and the water wasn't really too cold so that was fine.  I got out to where we were starting.  There was 10 teams all together.  We got started and at first I wasn't too far behind.  But when I got around the buoys I started struggling.  A little bit with some choppy water and also I think with just being tired from just finishing the sprint.

I have never felt safer in the water then I did the second half of that swim.  I was the only one left in the water and I had most of the water safety people right near me.  I saw a paddle board, a kayak, a jet ski and the sheriff's boat.  I think there might have been more farther out. lol

I took off to get on the bike.  The bike portion is just 3.5 miles so it is super short out and back.  My goal was to get back into transition before someone from the second person on any relay team was out on the bike.  Didn't quite make it.  My coach, Jon, was zipping out of the park on his bike as I was finishing.  I was close.

Now I had a new goal.  To finish the half mile run before Jon finished the bike and then passed me on the run.  I did manage to do that, although he wasn't very far behind me.  lol  I tagged off to Logan and he headed out.  Kathryn was next and then Joe was the anchor.  It was a lot of fun and wow, most of the people on the teams were FAST!!!

I was SO tired when I got done.  It was a very full day.

Last time over the bridge to the finish line for 2019.

Done and still smiling!

Got to have a picture with my awesome coach!!

Logan out of the water.

Logan heading to the finish.

Logan finishing up Leg 2!

Kathryn finishing the swim!

Leg #3 coming into the finish!

Smiles for miles!

Joe finishing up Leg #4

Finishing strong for the team.

Congrats on Event $4 Joe VV

Awesome Teammates: Logan, Joe, me and Kathryn

I am off the ground, I promise.

This one is better! lol

Probably my favorite picture of the entire weekend!

The only disappointment was that in the chaos of trying to switch from Sprint mode to Mixed Team Relay mode I don't know what I did with my Sprint finishers medal.  I am a little sad about that because I totally earned both my medal for the Sprint and for the Relay!!

Two races and one volunteering.  Busy!

Finn loves the camping/triathlon life!

Aunt Nancy rocked her 5k and came in 2nd in her age group and we picked up her bling for her since she had left before we were done to head back home.  I can't wait to see it displayed somewhere.  I'm thinking we need to get Nancy a medal holder for all the bling she has been getting.

Our friend Mark did the Duathlon (bike & run), came in 2nd in his age group and had a lot of fun.  Mark and his awesome wife Jodie stayed to cheer for us during the Sprint and the relay.  Kelli placed 1st in her age group and Kari got 3rd in hers for the Sprint Triathlon.

Overall it was an amazing weekend.  The rain didn't get in the way of having the best time.  We decided to go ahead and pack up the trailer and head for home since we would have to unpack and dry out a bunch of stuff.  We felt bad for the Posse because they had a lot of packing to do in the rain, which had started really dumping again after the relay.  They were going to have to pack it all, then take it home and unpack it so it could dry out and then pack it again.  That doesn't sound fun.  But like all things they did it with laughter, hijinks and shenanigans.  One of the many reasons that I love these events and the people that run them.

Here is the link to all the events that Best in the West puts on throughout the year.  Lots of triathlons and running events.  If you check it out, I bet you can find something that sounds fun.  http://www.bestinthewestevents.com/

Shout Out Time!

• Thank you Best in the West for all the free pictures.
• and the food.
• and the medals.
• and the fun.
• and setting everything up and making all of us feel like we won.
• and being the very best way for me to start and want to keep doing triathlons. 
• You pretty much rock!!
• Thank you to Ron & Rebecca, I "borrowed" some of your pictures off of Facebook.  lol
• Thank you to all the awesome Pure Endurance teammates for just being awesome.  I love being a part of this team!
• Thank you to my coach for understanding this "season" and taking me where I am at.  I've got some plans for next year Coach.  Can't wait to start planning for them! 
• Thank you to the best part of me, my very own partner in our own hijinks and shenanigans.  Joe, your patience with me this year has been extraordinary.  I love you so much!!  Can't wait to see where our adventures take us.  

I've got some things to work and some goals to readjust.  But my last shout out goes to my friends and family that have stood by my side this past season.  No judgement, no criticism just a lot of love and support.  I am so beyond grateful and am pretty sure that as crazy as I felt at times this past year, it would have been much more ugly without you all.  So for the people that hugged me when I needed it, cried with me when I cried, got me to laugh, reminded me of all the things I do right when all I can see is what I am doing wrong, prayed for me and prayed with me, old friends and new...Thank you.  I hope I will be able to do the same for you whenever you need it too.