Self Image

My coach asked me to do something this week.

It didn't have anything to do with a workout.

But it had everything to do with how I see myself.

He asked me to change one little word in the subtitle of my blog.

Overweight.

My blog is called "Running in Place and Getting Nowhere Fast: The ups and downs of an overweight lady trying to become healthy through running.  And now biking and swimming!  :-)"

Jon wants me to take out one little word.

At first I thought that it made sense.  I do need to change how I speak and think about myself and that's a great place to do it.

But here it is, four days later and I still haven't done it.

I literally have tears in my eyes thinking about it.

Sounds silly, doesn't it?

Self image is a really difficult thing to deal with.

I've identified myself for so long as an overweight person that I'm not sure what I am without that label.

I was trying to think of what over word I could put in place of overweight.

Happy, feisty, funny, athletic, loving, strong, amazing, scared, tired, frustrated, stressed, loved, hardworking, confident, uncertain, sassy, silly, friendly, loyal, fierce, exhausted.

There are so many words.  And yet the ones that come to mind first are these:

Fat, overweight, obese, unhealthy, incapable, slow, frustrated, big.

Shorter list but the words seem so much bigger.

Actually, writing out the two lists makes me realize that there is much more to me than just my size.

Huh.

While not everything in the first list is necessarily positive they are more realistic about my life and who I am then just focusing on the weight.

I have come a long way in many mental areas on my journey to be healthy.  However, I still have a long way to go in many mental areas.

Self image is still something that I need to change.  I may not speak it as much as I used to but it's still there.  I still think of my self as a fat person.  An overweight person.  I know that the scale isn't the end all of determining my health and fitness.  How my clothes fit is a better indication and what I'm capable of as an athlete is also something I should focus on. But his winter some weight came back on and my clothes don't fit like they did last summer.  This does not help with the self image of being overweight.

So I'm going to change the word overweight in the subtitle of my blog.  Because I know that I need to be speaking, and writing, with a different focus when it comes to my self image.

What word do you think I should use?  I'm planning on changing it in the next few days.  It would be interesting to see what word you think should be in the title.  😁